Friday, October 23, 2009
Laura Scott : My New Shero
I have blogged about this hot button topic before: to have kids or to not have kids. Well writer Laura Scott has blown the lid off of couples who choose to remain childless in her new book "Two is Enough: A Couple's Guide to Living Childless By Choice".
The writer clearly states that her maternal instinct never kicked in. I admire Scott for that alone. Not every woman is a nurturer, nor desires to be. This does not make Scott a monster but someone who knows her limitations.
I also like the fact that her husband was in total agreement. I look at husbands and their wives and wonder how many of them if given the chance to do it over again would make the choice to have children. A former friend of mine was always too worn out from being a working mom with 2 kids to have any romantic time with the husband. I'm not saying they had a sexless marriage, but there were no date nights, no weekends alone, no spontaneity. Scott stresses that conversation about whether or not to have kids needs to be done before the vows take place. What baffles me is that there are women and men who don't even bring up the subject of children during the dating stage, and then act all shocked and surprised when after the vows their now spouse scoffs at the idea of kids.
Girlfriends and Sex and the City took on this subject very well. Joan had fallen hard for sexy Brock and was ready to marry him only to find out he was not interested in starting a family with her. Carrie on SATC also fell hard but for a fiftyish artist who had already raised a family and was not interested in starting another one at his age.
There are other factors listed in the article which play a factor in a couple's decision: economics, careers, leisure interests, etc. Let's face it as cute as Shiloh, Zahara, and Nahla are, their asses are expensive. Fortunately for them their parents have money and can hire help with the kiddies when it's time for them to go to a premiere, or jet off to some exotic locale to make a movie. We average Janes and Joes can't do this. Finding a sitter that you trust enough to leave your kid with for 2 hours so you can catch a movie at the theatre and not wait on Netflix to release it is a feat in itself.
Feedback please people. I love your comments and if you want to read the article I based my blog on, here's the link:http://www.aolhealth.com/healthy-living/relationships/childless-by-choice.